Using Your Pronouns Is Virtue Signaling for God’s Love, Writes Jesuit Brother

Why should we share our pronouns on social media?

In an essay for The Jesuit Post, Br. Ken Homan, S.J., answers this question by sharing his own journey of adding pronouns to his online profiles and the ways that it has helped him connect to the LGBTQ+ community.

Back in 2021, Homan’s friend posted an Instagram story urging people to add their pronouns to their profiles. Homan responded with a “hands clapping” emoji to show his support. His friend responded, “So when are you going to do it?” Homan had to stop and think. It was possible that some people would “criticize [his] faith,” call for his “expulsion from the Jesuits,” or even proclaim his “eternal damnation,” if he publicly identified his pronouns.

Despite all of this, Homan decided to add his pronouns to his social media and professional bios. He offered three reasons for why he decided to do so.

First, as a former high school teacher, Homan believes that adding one’s pronouns is an act of support for transgender youth. In the U.S., transgender youth are constantly told that “they are not worthy of love and often not worthy of life,” he observes. The National Institutes of Health reports that at least 41% of transgender people have survived a suicide attempt, which indicates an immense lack of care and support for this population. As someone who previously struggled with suicidal ideations and mental health issues, Homan believes that it is his “sacred duty as a Jesuit brother to care for and serve the vulnerable” so that no child has to doubt their self-worth.

Secondly, adding pronouns to one’s profile can “dispel anti-trans myths.” These myths, ranging from ‘grooming’ children to transgender awareness being a “fad,” are harmful and inaccurate. Homan states:

“While some myths have emerged simply from a lack of understanding, many more are the result of groups and individuals fostering hate and bigotry. As a Jesuit, I have a responsibility to pursue truth in the factual sense and Truth in the theological sense. Myths and scare tactics have no place in that pursuit.”

“Being transgender is not a sin. Being transgender is not new or a fad. While the precise language or our understanding may have changed (as language so often does), there is historical evidence of transgender or gender non-conforming persons dating back centuries.”

Unfortunately, myths about the LGBTQ+ community have led to increased hate crimes and anti-equality legislation. Homan’s last reason for identifying his pronouns is that showing support for the transgender community ultimately combats hate.

The reason why identifying one’s pronouns is such a powerful tool is because it is “virtue signaling,” states Homan. While the Gospels tell us that we should not flaunt our values, Homan argues that signaling our virtues is important in solidarity work. Putting our pronouns in our bios is similar to a “sign out front of a church with God’s message of love,” which makes it easier for us to “welcome people in.” He continues:

“Adding my gender pronouns to my profile is virtue signaling. I fully embrace that! We often use virtue signaling as a derogatory and mocking term. But I’d like to challenge that. We signal our virtues all the time by the clothes we wear, the language we use, and even where we spend money. . . .

“By having both my Jesuit initials (“S.J.”) and my pronouns in my profile, I’m attempting to signal some clear messages. To LGBTQ+ persons, I’m stating that I will respect your preferred pronouns and that you can talk to me about spirituality and being an LGBTQ+ person. I’m trying to signal that I am both very committedly religious and someone safe to talk to. I’m signaling that I have a baseline understanding of what it might mean to be transgender. It’s also an attempt to make sharing one’s preferred pronouns not so isolating.”

Homan knows that more must be done to support the LGBTQ+ community outside of just pronoun identification. He often thinks and prays about “the best route” to support transgender people. Yet, he is certain of one thing:

“I know for a fact that being vocally and visibly loving of LGBTQ+ persons–including by priests and religious–has helped to save lives and to draw people closer to Christ.”

—Sarah Cassidy (she/her), New Ways Ministry, August 10, 2023