R.I.P. Phil Donahue: Catholic Advocate for LGBTQ+ Equality
Unmentioned in yesterday’s initial obituaries and news accounts of the death of popular television talk show host Phil Donahue was his strong advocacy for LGBTQ+ Catholics, a legacy that has helped an uncountable number of people, particularly students and alumni from the University of Notre Dame, Indiana, from which he graduated in 1957.
Donahue, along with his actress wife Marlo Thomas, were ardent supporters of the Gay & Lesbian Alumni of Notre Dame & St. Mary’s (GALA), the longtime association of LGBTQ+ alums, one of the first and largest LGBTQ+ alumni groups at a Catholic college. The celebrity duo always opened their Manhattan penthouse apartment to the organization for the group’s annual autumn fundraising event for an LGBTQ+ scholarship fund to benefit Notre Dame students.
Phil Donahue addresses the Pilgrimage of Mercy in 2016.
Perhaps Donahue’s most public support of the GALA group was in September 2016 when he headlined the organization’s Pilgrimage of Mercy, a prayer walk across Manhattan to mark the Year of Mercy called by Pope Francis. The event was featured as was a plea for extending mutual mercy between the LGBTQ+ community and the institutional Catholic Church.
Donahue was a recipient of GALA’s Thomas A. Dooley Award, named for the Notre Dame alumnus who became a prominent voice for humitarian care in the late 1950s because of a popular book he wrote about his work as a doctor in Southeast Asia just before the onset of the Viet Nam War. Decades later, Dooley, who was extolled by Catholic leaders around the globe and who died an untimely death from cancer in 1961, was revealed to be a closeted gay man.
Ms. Thomas received the same award in 2022. Sister Jeannine Gramick, New Ways Ministry’s Co-Founder, accepted the Dooley Award in 2003, and was a guest of Donahue and Thomas in their apartment.
In his life as a talk show host, Donahue often provocatively and courageously addressed the issues of sexual orientation, gender stereotypes, and gender identity. During an interview with the website TruthOut in 2014, Donahue told the following story of the very beginning of his talk show in 1967, which at the time was only broadcast in Chicago:
We put a gay guy on on the third show. . . .[N]obody was out in 1967. And I’m 16 years of Catholic education, including four in Notre Dame (I’m a graduate of Notre Dame University), where we were taught that we love the sinner but hate the sin. . . .I later realized [it was] a very condescending thing, in that the church was promoting homophobia more virulently than [any] other institution. And here comes this gay guy, and I am scared to death. I’m figuring they’re going to think I’m queer, which is what we called them then. And I remember going to high school with guys who wanted to beat up queers. I never wanted to beat up a queer, but I didn’t want to be with any queers. And now I got a queer right here on my program. And, of course, the phones are going crazy. The mail is coming in to the general manager. Mothers thought their children would catch it. Why are we aggrandizing this man? You know, you put[ing] him on television. . .[I]t’s like there’s nothing wrong with being queer.”
In 1974, before his show reached a nationwide audience, Donahue interviewed the Segal family of Philadelphia (whose gay son Mark Segal became the publisher of Philadelphia Gay News), the first time a family with a gay member was interviewed on broadcast television.
Donahue with an audience member questioning Fr. John McNeill, in 1976.
In 1976, he interviewed the theologian Father John J. McNeill, SJ, who had just written the groundbreaking theological book, The Church and the Homosexual.
And in the 1980s, he was one of the first prominent figures to address the HIV/AIDS epidemic in a public forum
He also spoke at the 2009 convention of Dignity/USA, a Catholic LGBTQ+ organization, held that year in Washington, DC.
In an interview with The New York Times in April 2002, Donahue said said: Raised a Catholic and educated at a Catholic high school before attending Notre Dame, Donahue said “I had 16 years of Catholic education. I was a very good Catholic.” When pushed by the interviewer about why he used the past tense, he explained:
“I am a divorced and remarried Catholic. I refused to have my first marriage annulled. I refused to pay a fee to four or five celibate men whom I didn’t know, who would somehow, behind closed doors, conclude that my marriage never existed. I do see myself as a Catholic. I will always be a Catholic. But I want my church to join the human race and finally walk away from this antisexual theology.”
Donahue’s advocacy for LGBTQ+ people, which had roots in his Catholic identity, is an important part of the church’s conversation about sexuality and gender which continues. He’s an example of how lay people can influence the church often times more powerfully than bishops, clergy, and religious. May he rest in peace, but may his legacy for justice and equality still carry on in lay people who continue to ask provocative and courageous questions.
[Editor’s note: If there are any LGBTQ+ Notre Dame and St. Mary’s alums who would like to share memories of Phil Donahue, please do so in the “Comments” section of this post. We would all love to hear your stories.]
—Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry, August 20, 2024
I spoke from the audience when John McNeill was interviewed about my AIDS MINISTRY. I was threatened afterwards by a Mr. Morrissey from the panel with a Trial, which came to pass.
Thank you. A life well lived.
Thank for this story. I never knew how Mr. Donahue was such an advocate for LGBTQ issues as a Catholic. I laugh at the annullment comment. The fact that these prehistoric systems that raised money for the church from the patronizing wealthy illustrate it still is in the business of selling indulgences and its clergy’s love of power over God’s people. As a Catholic who was married for 34 years and finally came out in my 60’s and divorced my wife, I blame the institutionalize church for leading me to believe that marriage would cure my internal longing for a man to share my life with. The church has never really reformed from the challenge of Martin Luther in 1517. As a peripheral catholic trying to drive change in the church I fully admire those like Mr Donahue but is frustrating to know that it took 4 centuries for it to accept sciences of Galileo and Copernicus. As it continues to defy science and clear evidence of God’s tremendous variety of human sexuality because it doesn’t fit the definition of its natural law and its venerable saints who espoused it leaves it at precipice and its faithless belief that survival is to be paralyzed with fear.
Thanks for the great article. I was involved in 2004 as a senior at Notre Dame when we distributed over 2,300 “Gay? Fine by me” T-shirts on campus. The news coverage reached Donahue and Thomas, who contacted us with their support. It was a great honor to know that such an important figure from Notre Dame was behind us.
Thank you, Phil Donohue, for years of open talk. And thank you for continuing to be Catholic and showing another way to be Catholic
I am also a ND alum and was involved in several of the fundraiser’s in Phil and Marlo’s apartment. It was clear that Phil attributed the success of his show to the LGBTQ community. He felt that by telling the stories of the community he was not only creating awareness, but it was good for ratings. He walked in the St. Pat’s for all parade in Queens and he was really excited to walk in the St. Patrick’s Day parade up fifth avenue when they finally allowed Lavender and Green to march in the parade. He loved his University but constantly pushed them to be more accepting and supportive of the LGBTQ+ community. He will be missed.