Belmont Abbey Student’s Decision to Come Out in 2004 Offers Lessons for Today

Matt Ottaviani and family at his graduation from Belmont Abbey College in 2004

Catholic higher education in the U.S. has long led the wider church on efforts for LGBTQ+ inclusion with institutions providing resource centers, support groups, non-discrimination protections, and more.

While LGBTQ-friendly Catholic campuses seem commonplace now, it is important to remember that this inclusive reality was not always so. The current welcoming atmosphere is the result of many people who advocated for LGBTQ+ inclusion before it was widely accepted. Matt Ottaviani is one of these people, and today’s post details why.

Ottaviani attended Belmont Abbey, a Catholic college in North Carolina, from 2000 to 2004. While there, he was known for being the student body president, senior class president, and a tennis player. He was also known for publicly coming out as a homosexual via a February 2004 article in the student newspaper.

The work of this pioneering student was recently chronicled in The Voice, an online newsletter about embracing diverse perspectives in the Belmont Abbey College community. While Ottaviani loved Belmont Abbey and the school community, he struggled with the anti-LGBTQ+ rhetoric he heard from students in his classes. He decided to use his voice and leadership to challenge student beliefs. Reflecting on his past, he told The Voice, an alumni newsletter not affiliated with the college:

“‘If I look at my 21-year-old self, it’s a little weird. It was strange to reflect on. I wasn’t doing it for credit. I was friends with these students and was looking to shake it up.'”

As a student, Ottaviani wrote an article titled, “Homosexuality: Fear it, or understand it?” It was published on the front page of campus newspaper The Crusader. In the article, Ottaviani came out as a homosexual in order to bring “awareness to the issues and difficulties that many other homosexuals” face.

Dr. Martin Harris, advisor to students at The Crusader, said the young journalists were “pretty positive” about Ottaviani’s coming out, since he aimed to “be helpful and make things better” for others. Ottaviani also received support from some of the Benedictine monks who sponsor the college. They “were so loving and warm” during his time at Belmont Abbey, Ottaviani said.

Unfortunately, Belmont Abbey College has become less accepting and welcoming towards the LGBTQ+ community over recent years. The school previously filed a Title IX exemption on religious liberty grounds to be exempted from non-discrimination protections related to gender and sexuality, and it has also supported anti-LGBTQ+ judicial activists at the Supreme Court.

Matt Ottaviani and his daughter at Belmont Abbey College’s campus in 2024

For years, Ottaviani did not return to campus due to the shift in campus culture. Yet, he recently returned to meet up with friends, professors, and campus ministers. His visit reminded him of how meaningful Belmont Abbey was to him. He hopes that the school will work towards loving and accepting all students, regardless of their sexual or gender identities. He reflected:

“I didn’t have a desire to come back (at first) because of the changes the school went through in 2004 and all the years after. I live life as a happy and successful gay man, husband and father. I have to think that one day, The Abbey will return to a place of love and accepting all the lives that are so lucky to call it home.”

Ottaviani’s bravery and courage to publicly come out in 2004 reminds us of the importance of authenticity and advocacy. Even though Catholic institutions have made progress in terms of inclusion, some schools create unsafe spaces for LGBTQ+ folks. According to New Ways Ministry’s Associate Director, Robert Shine, Belmont Abbey should look back on the “honest, transparent conversation” that occurred in 2004. Shine told The Voice:

“It is an eminently Catholic act to return to our tradition in finding answers to today’s questions. In that vein, it seems Belmont Abbey College’s campus conversation about homosexuality in 2004 could be a rich source of reflection for the community today.”

“What should not be lost amid the progress today, however, is the students, faculty, and staff who advocated and witnessed — sometimes for years, if not decades — to make Catholic institutions more welcoming in a more hostile time. The decisions by Matt Ottaviani and other students at Catholic schools to come out was courageous but essential in producing change.”

—Sarah Cassidy (she/her), New Ways Ministry, July 25, 2024