The Archdiocese of San Francisco has instituted a series of radio advertisements promoting marriage. Part of the advertisements’ message asked married couples how many people are influenced by their marriages.
In a commentary on KQED radio, Kevin Fisher-Paulson, who is a captain with the San Francisco Sheriff’s Department, felt that this is exactly the type of question that needs to be asked:
“You know what? They got this right. Lots of people are affected by my marriage.
“I’m not talking about Catholic marriage, where 40 percent end in divorce. I’m talking about my own gay marriage.”
Kevin, who married his partner, Brian, in California in 2008 during the short period of time when marriage equality existed in the state, provided an interesting answer to the question:
“Brian and I got married, without blessing of either church or law, 25 years ago this month. And in those years, we have fostered medically at risk triplets, nursed friends dying of AIDS, helped friends detox from heroin, taken in rescue dogs and adopted drug-exposed, multi-racial foster children. None of my or Brian’s brothers is still with his first wife, but Brian and I have stood together, for richer and poorer, in sickness and in health. And that has affected the way that our friends look at gay men and their ability to commit.”
Kevin, like many Catholics, hopes for the day when both state and church recognize the commitments of lesbian and gay couples. He states:
“In the meantime, my husband and I attend Most Holy Redeemer, that gay-friendly church in the Castro, so the rest of the Church can see how many people are affected by our marriage.”
–Francis DeBernardo, New Ways Ministry